Pink Ribbon...

It's all coming back to me now. The feelings around my dad, the illness and all the insecurity that comes with not knowing. Even though I have to say that I don't believe somethings wrong before it's on paper.

Yesterday I watched Oprah, yes I do that sometimes. And it was about breast cancer. The one whom survived it and the history around how the pink ribbon came to life. Just push the headline, there's a link.

Why I write about this today is that I'm having my biopsy tonight at 6pm, in my armpit. Because I found a lump about a month ago, I went to my doctor. Who sent me to mammography, that ended up with an ultrasound the same day and then the doctor asked me if I could come back for a biopsy the next week. All the thoughts that went trough in my head then. I know there's nothing to worry about, but I just lost my dad to cancer so like human nature it's natural to react on this. When I was done with my mammography and ultrasound I called my mom and freaked out for few minutes before I came back to myself. Then I went around a week with not thinking about this. So yesterday when I saw this on Oprah it shook my bones! And my thoughts begin to wander again.
But I've got all odds with me, because I'm young and it's probably just a gland. And I met a lot of young survivors from cancer.

So until tonight I'm sitting here with my cold and wait for Lena to come home. She's coming with me and I'm thankful! This is one of these things I'm glad for having someone with me on. Otherwise I'm an independent woman!



Copyright © 2009 Lady AhY

Rest in peace Dad..

So here went a new weekend, This time around I was in Tønsberg, the town where I grew up. Visiting my family and my friends. Hooking up and dancing the night away with champagne. Had a GREAT night!

I visited my father on Friday, it has been two weeks since I saw him and the changes are huge! My heart aches and my mind do not know how to react. I do not know what to say anymore. And for you who know me, that is a first for me! It is hard to be myself and act "normal" around a person who is in so much pain. The only thing I want to do is to hold my father and tell him that everything will be alright!

And now it is, in some way. He has no more pain and died in peace.

I have spent a few days writing this, so much has happened!
My father, REST IN PEACE! Died the 1st of October. I got a call from my mom and she told me that he was worse. So my sister and I took the train home. The whole family where there, mom, my brother and sister and our aunt ( dads sister). I must say that I hate this illness, cancer. I would not wish it for my worst enemy, never! To see a person I love so much just slip away like that in front of me was like losing my heart! I wish there was something that I could do or say just to make this easier for the next person who experiences this, but there is not. The only thing that exist is hope and that you maybe will be cured. But the harsh truth is that some do die. But remember your friends and family. They love you no matter what! And your life goes on and you will never be alone!

My thoughts and love go out to all of you who have lost someone you love!!

I love you dad, now and forever! See you in our next life..


LIVESTRONG

Copyright © 2008 Lady AhY