Showing posts with label See you in my nightmares. Show all posts
Showing posts with label See you in my nightmares. Show all posts

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

All work and no play..


So a new semester has started and all of the eager gym enthusiasts are all over the place with their new years resolutions and shit!

No excuses people, but I just don't get it. Why stress so much for something that just lasts for a couple of weeks? OK, some of you are for real! But I know myself and to say it and doing it, that's two completely different things peoples! Anyways for me, I use so much energy anyways, so I've found out that I keep in shape.. But I know I'm not getting younger, even though I'm not old! I look like I did in high school, so I chill for a little while longer. And until then I've taken up the search for LOVE!

Like I said to my roommate, Lena, the other day; "maybe it's best just being me and single?"

But the thing I found out it's that the one has to appreciate me for me! And it's a tricky thing. Yes, I've asked around a little lately to find out how people really see me. And all in all they see me as a sweet person, but that I can flip. I'm trying to control this. But don't I have the right to react sometimes? Me, the one you almost always see smiling, being happy and try to not be to much. So at times, I overload. My brain aches and it feels like I'm gonna explode inside. Where are you then? Why can't I open to you when I feel sad and depressed?
Yes, I blog. And a friend of mine, Edin, said that he thinks it's tough that I expose myself like this. But do I really? When the ones that known me all my life don't even know me for real? And when I can't open for anybody? There's a reason for why I'm not telling you about my deep inside. The big black hole in me.

And I'm not an patient person and it doesn't seem like I will be either for that matter.. But I still try, and it's hard! And can someone tell me why I always wind up waiting? It's so not my style at all!!
And last but not least, what's up with all the X's peoples???



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